Mama Pat


“Love is watching someone die.”

Since April 20, 2016, the date my mother was diagnosed with an inoperable brain tumor, I knew this day was coming sooner rather than later. The ups and downs, with each doctor visit and each stage of treatment, were difficult, but love sticks around. Love means watching the deterioration happen day by day. Love is watching someone die.

When I first heard the diagnosis, I set goals. I told her I would stand by her. I told her that I would back her up in whatever her wishes were. And the main goal I set for myself was to make sure that she knew how loved she was by so many people.

I hope I succeeded.

Along with that Death Cab for Cutie song above, another that really got me was the song “Flirted With You All My Life,” originally by Vic Chesnutt but covered by David Bazan. I’m a Bazan fan, and his voice and delivery really make this song impactful, especially this part:

“And when my mom was cancer sick
She fought, but then succumb to it
And you, you made her beg for it
‘Jesus, please, I’m ready’”


I love you, Mom. And I miss you already.


25 thoughts on “Mama Pat

  1. Josh, I am incredibly sorry for your loss. I hope your sweet memories bring you comfort through the tough days ahead. Hugs

  2. Sweet Josh. My heart breaks for your loss. Losing a parent is very hard. The pain doesn’t go away but it does subside and memories sustain us. It was evident that your mom loved you very much. She raised a kind and loving son. Peace be with you friend. Carol

  3. Oh no Josh. I knew Pat many years ago in mobile. Actually I was here when you were born. You use to come to my house to visit. I’m so very sorry to hear this. Our thoughts and prayers are with you all. 🙏🙏

  4. Josh,
    I have thought of you and your Mom since you left Hope Lodge. I have often wished that I could have come to Montgomery to visit with your Mom.
    I have many fond memories of talking and spending time with her. I remember how when Donna Kay played the piano she wanted to be moved closer and I watched her sing along with the songs. Or on the 4th of July when she almost got away! You both have been in my thoughts and prayers since we were at Hope Lodge.
    You are a wonderful son and I know that she loved you dearly!
    May our God bring you peace and comfort.
    Kathy Smith

  5. May “The Comforter” be with you and your family during this time. May you take comfort in knowing you are not saying good bye but simply saying I’ll see you later

  6. Josh, I am so sorry to hear the news of your Mom’s passing. Being there for her over the past year while she wrestled with this terrible illness was the most sincere act of love you could possibly express, and I have no doubt that it gave her much strength. Please accept my deepest condolences. May her memory live on through your thoughts and actions, and be for a blessing for all eternity.

  7. Josh, I am so sorry. My Momma Pat was the best. I was always inspired nd loved by her. I lost my mom and my dad’s n his way to nursing home. Josh I’ve always her deeply

  8. Sorry for your loss. We were neighbors for only 10 months, but we were able to stay in contact ( thanks to Facebook). Josh, we will keep you in our thoughts and prayers.
    Blanche & Darren

  9. Josh, I am so sorry. I also know that”love is watching someone die.” As a mom, I can truly say that your momma died proud. Proud of her son. May the Lord wrap his arms around you and give you peace.

  10. Pingback: Thank you | josh carples

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